In an unprecedented display of openness and humility, Microsoft Chairman Bill Gates announced at a press conference on Friday that, “Microsoft’s days of corporate greed, arrogance and bullying are over. From now on, I will personally guarantee that every user of our products is completely satisfied. I’m putting my money where my mouth is.”

Set to retire in July 2008 from the daily chores of running Microsoft, Gates vowed to devote himself full-time to, “correcting the bad behavior of the past and compensating unsatisfied computer users who have lost time, sleep, health and money struggling with our products.” Gates said that he is directing his top management executives to transform Microsoft’s Windows Genuine Advantage program into one that will allow unsatisfied Microsoft customers to recoup losses incurred as a result of software flaws and failures.

For years, Microsoft’s Windows operating system, Internet Explorer website browser and Office productivity programs have been sources of frustration to millions of computer users. Riddled with programming flaws, security holes and stability problems, Microsoft software has caused a loss of time and productivity to almost every person that has used their products. Worldwide monetary losses associated with Microsoft software problems since the release of its Windows 95 operating system are estimated to be between $70-100 trillion.

Through the newly revamped Windows Genuine Advantage program, unsatisfied users of Microsoft products may submit monetary claims for damages directly to the office of Bill Gates. “I’m appointing former Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer as my personal Secretary of Compensation. Steve’s job will be to ensure that every person that has suffered loss as a result of our software is amply compensated,” Gates said.

The claims process is designed to be relatively painless, in contrast to the hoops that one must jump through just to install, activate and “validate” current Microsoft products. Applicants may download an official compensation form at www.microsoft.com/compensation. They will need to describe what Microsoft product was being used at the time of the alleged loss, a brief but detailed description of how the software product failed, and an estimate of how much time and productivity was lost as a result of the product failure. Applicants will also provide a dollar-per-hour amount that they think would be fair compensation. The application must then be notarized and sent certified mail. All but the most ridiculous claims, such as using your computer in the shower, will be honored, Gates said.

Reaction to Gate’s announcement was swift, and mostly positive. “It’s about time,” said Apple Computer CEO Steve Jobs. “We’ve been trying to be the best for years. I’m glad to see that Bill (Gates) has had a change of heart, and that Microsoft will start cleaning up its act.” “Halleluiah!” exclaimed one Seattle housewife. “I lost all of my digital family photos last week when Windows crashed, and the stress almost sent me to the hospital. Maybe I can get something back for my loss.”Dave Moore, computer columnist for Norman, Oklahoma’s daily newspaper The Transcript was skeptical. “I don’t believe it, not a single word. Of course, it’s not every week that my article is published on April 1. Happy April Fools Day.”

 

By Dave Moore

 

 

 

 

 

 

Here are around 500 or more pictures of the bad weather we had today 4.11.08 (Friday) of the Tornadoes and Storms.

 

Plus a lot of other picturs in history of events that have happened in the state of Alabama.

 

Enjoy, Pictures

 

Mr. Bitlockers

 

NEW TORNADO WARNING…includes Birmingham…
Tornado warning for Northern Jefferson, SE Walker, North Central Tuscaloosa Counties until 430 p.m. Tornado near Windham Springs, moving east at 40. Dangerous storm will pass across Jefferson County including the Birmingham Metro area.

New severe thunderstorm warning Bibb, NW Chilton, South Central Jefferson, NE Perry and Shelby Counties. Until 445 p.m. Dangerous storm is near Ellards in Bibb County or 7 miles south of Brent. WIll move toward Centreville, Jemison, Montevallo, Calera and Columbiana. Will get into southern Jefferson as well.

Severe thunderstorm warning north central Calhoun, extreme west central Cherokee, Etowah and NE St. Clair Counties until 430 p.m. STorm near Horse Pens 40.

New severe thunderstorm warning for Blount and Walker Counties until 4 p.m. Storm near Cordova may have produced a tornado according to a trained spotter Brett Adair. Will move toward Sipsey and Smoke Rise.

Severe thunderstorm warning for West Central Jefferson, South Central Walker, SE Fayette and northern Tuscaloosa Counties until 4:15….storm near Samantha…will move near WIndham Springs and Gorgas Steam Plant on way toward Birminghamport. Very large hail. This warning may have to be upgraded to a tornado warning according to the NWS.

Severe thundertsorm warning for SW Tuscaloosa…Pickens…northern Greene and NW Sumter Counties until 4:15 p.m. Dangerous storm near Geiger or 35 miels SW Of Tuscaloosa.

Tornado warning southern Cullman County has expired.

Tornado watch continues for West and Northwest Alabama until 4p.m. Tornado watch continues for much of the rest of North and North Central Alabama until 9 p.m. Severe thunderstorm watch for South Central Alabama until 9 p.m.

 

 

 

 

Well I wanted to comment on another blog today so I had to sign up in order to comment and ended up with another blog with them, just what I needed!

 

Here it is if you want to see it or maybe you like to have many blogs and want to sign up!

 

 

 

 

What will you do with yours!

 

 

 

 

 

My Blog isn't all about Bill Gates, I just like the Videos I posted about him! 

 

Mr. Bitlockers 

 

 

Check out Bill Gates Home! If he gets tire of it I'll take it!

 

 

MR. Bitlockers!

 

 

 

 

 It's Bill Gates last day!

 

Check it out Here!

 

MR. Bitlockers

 

 

 

Bill Gates is retiring

 

 

Check it out here!

 

MR. Bitlockers

 

 

 

This is too funny click here!

 

Mr. Bitlockers

 

 

Well it looks like the Cat has been on the computer again!

Is the dog is gone now, I can't find him any where...

 

 

 

Girl with two faces...

 

Is baby with two faces a goddess?: People are flocking to Northern India to worship 1-month-old Lali, who was born with two faces, because they believe she is the reincarnation of a Hindu goddess. Her parents say their daughter is doing well—she can eat from both mouths and open and close both sets of eyes at the same time.

 

 

MR. Bitlockers

 

 

Well this is my first blog ever and I've been on the Internet since it started!

 

 

Well lets see how this blog works!

 

Mr. Bitlockers